Wow its already December, what a year we have had in 2016. As you look back retrospectively, you notice you have tried everything and haven’t achieved your goals month in and month out. You have tried attending various conferences, seminars, and even reading current books but things haven’t just turned out for you in 2016.
As the new year beckons, the question remains, how do you intend to turn around your situation? Do you intend to try the same things as you have done in the current year, accept your situation as fate accompli or wait for a hero to rescue you or employ strategies that can get you out of your rut?
If you are still stuck and anchored to the same position you have been since January, it doesn’t mean you cant break the chains? The duration and depth of the situations we go through varies and at times we are just stationed in places that we feel the most pain, lack growth, lack opportunities or advancement. You might be stuck in a job that just pays the bills but drains you out both emotionally and physically or you are struggling to start a business or cant find a way out of debt, it doesn’t mean your choices are limited.
When stuck for sometime, your mind can condition you to treat any gradual or sudden changes as a threat inevitably catapulting you into the fear zone. You become scared to take the step in the right direction even for things you are most passionate about. As you map your way out you certainly experience fear of starting again, being rejected, looked down upon, not seen as important or trying something new.
You need to follow through some of these tips we have written for you so you can push through the unknown, attain growth and get off your stagnant situation.
Overcome the perception of impossibilities; When you are stuck your mind can get paralysed and lose the ability to detect opportunities as they come. Sadly, even the most doe-able opportunities seem impossible and out of your reach. Imagine how you would feel if you knew that such opportunities would change your current state? You are more likely to feel hopeless because you are letting opportunities pass you by. That makes you feel inadequate and exacerbate your situation. You need to change your mindset and tell yourself that even though the outlook seems dull, there is something you can do. Nothing can be impossible until you have tried. Try and explore as many options so you can change how things are. You have all the power you need to take the necessary steps to break out of the rut.
Avoid blaming others; When confronted with a hopeless situation it is common for people to point fingers. Instead of thinking of strategies that can turn the situation around, more time is consumed blaming others so you can have a pseudo-peace of mind. The peace derived from shifting blame to others is temporal and hardly enough to get you out of the rut. Instead, invest your time in understanding how you got to where you are, what can be done, what choices you can have and what steps you should take to regain control of your life.
Stop comparing yourself to others; If you love yourself that much, you would never subject yourself to any form of comparison be it beauty, wealth, career, relationship with that of the next person. Any form of comparison can be toxic to your confidence and esteem especially if you compare your weakest spot to that of the next person’s strongest or above average spot. The result of such a futile exercise leave you distraught and incompetent. There is no value derived from comparisons that especially leave you feeling like you can never come out of your situation.
Be grateful for what you have; Learn to appreciate what you have. It is easy to go about mourning and complaining that you are stuck or life is not happening for you. Sometimes you need to take a minute and have a look at what you have today. Take a stock of personal achievements before you get frustrated. When you are grateful even for small things and every achievement you attain you are less likely to feel stuck. If you are thankful and exercise gratitude you can find what really makes your life worth living.
Even the tiniest possible step is progress; We all want to achieve big things and wow ourselves. Don’t ever go about in your current situation thinking that because you haven’t got capital then you cant start a big project, you cant change a career because its risky or you cant be in a relationship then you cant achieve anything. Suppose any of these limitations were true, you could still attain something by setting achievable targets. Instead of starting a project that needs more capital to bankroll, you could start small. Small things count and can eventually lead you to where you want to be.
Nothing changes if nothing changes; When you are in a difficult situation the last thing you want anyone to tell you is that nothing will change if nothing changes. As unfair as this might sound, the burden lies with you. It is your responsibility to make sure that the needed change happens. Unfortunately, this only materialises if you take action. Take action and start training harder if you are thinking of becoming a sports person, start searching for a university that offers a degree you are interested in, start searching for a job that brings you more satisfaction, start thinking about a business plan for your dream business, and set yourself on a path to achieve your goals. The much-needed difference will only come if you initiate the moves.
Clear your life of all the negativity; When you are feeling stuck, you are likely to invite a lot of negativity both from within and without. When you are surrounded by negative people they can only paint your future dark. Associating with negative people dwindles the chances of you making better choices in your life. Added to that you begin to accept that this is it for you and life wouldn’t change even if you were to make an effort. You begin to think that you are less competent, having nothing to offer and you cant achieve anything.
Focus on yourself and not what they want you to be; If you go about caring what every Mary and Jane thinks , you will certainly remain stuck. Mary and Jane will always have something to say, however their opinions should be dismissed for what they are. People’s opinions are at times merely conjectures that cant be situated in your life. Entertaining every person’s opinions destructs you from focusing on what you should be doing. This is why when you look back after two years you question where that time has gone and why you still at the same level. Sadly, you rob yourself of variable time because you are too busy being a darling. You don’t owe anyone anything so there is no need for you to hold off your plans so you can impress.
Remind yourself you have choices; You can easily feel like you are suffocating especially when faced with limited options. Much as you would want to believe that you are stuck in a difficult place, there is always a choice. No matter how hard things can look or sound, there is a way things can be turned around. You could be stressed after failing to secure capital for a business that was going to pull you out of debt, or you have tried applying for several positions you think you could have landed, or you still trying to have a stable relations but you remain stuck, nothing is giving away. It is rather ‘normal’ to think that you choices are weaning away. Despite the myriad of challenges, life also presents you with a lot of choice. It is up to you to weigh them and where necessary consider any trade-offs for what is necessary today versus the life you want in the future.
As counter-intuitive as this may sound, you might need to give yourself a pat on the back if you feel stuck in life. Often those who notice life isn’t progressing at the rate and direction they anticipate are more talented, ambitions with above average capabilities. Despite lack of progress, they never tire to find a way out and if they don’t seem to find a way, they feel life isn’t moving. On the contrary and not intending to be condescending, those who are comfortable in their current state be it at the low end or high end hardly feel the same.
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